Gratitude

My new approach.

It had not been raining for a few days. The mud on the ground was now dry; some had hardened and some stayed soft; it clung to the sole of my boots. The blades of grass were covered in frost. It was early January, in the deep of winter, the temperatures barely hovered above 0C. The wind chill brought the temperatures further down still. The air was dry. Every cell in my body was screaming for me to return to the comfort and warmth of home. But I needed to be here. It was my first outdoor archery practice of the year.

I looked up at the vast blue sky, adorned with some fluffy clouds. The sun was shining. I noticed the bare trees with their branches reaching out into the sky, they offered beauty despite the lack of lush green foliages. The shadows cast on the ground displayed such a delicate pattern. How beautiful the world was. I smiled.

As the new year is finally here, I noticed that gratitude appears in many people’s resolution list. Gratitude as a habit has been a hot topic for a long while now, everyone of note recommends it. There are even journals one can purchase to cultivate this habit. Many recommend starting the day and/or ending the day with listing three things for which you are grateful.

I did try this method for at least a year. Whenever I did my morning pages*, I’d start with writing down the three little things, such as the delicious morning cup of coffee my hubby would make me each morning, even just waking up which means another day to live, to do the things I love doing.

While the method worked, I found that after a while it became a routine. It was a challenge to write the same things every single day at the same time, not that I’m not grateful for them but to muster the “feeling” – which is the most important part of the habit – was becoming increasingly difficult. Our brains love novelty, this is why one’s brain gets healthier when it learns something new. And the feel-good chemicals will then be released as a reward.

So I came up with a new method, a reframe. It goes like this:

The world/universe/God (pick your player) wants to make you happy.

Is it true? Probably not. I think the better question would be is it useful? I experimented with this reframe in earnest in 2025, with deliberate intention. This reframe is all about noticing and shifting the perspective. The way I think about this reframe is that every day the world brings you “offerings” to make you happy.

The other day I got up in the morning and was treated to a beautiful skyscape. It was a stunning display of orange and coral pink, Payne’s gray, and even a bit of cerulean blue peeking behind some fluffy clouds. It was nature’s painting, it was a beautiful offering, how could I not appreciate it? I didn’t just feel happy, I felt blessed. And that, I think, is one of the best experiences of being human.

During my first outdoor archery practice of the new year, I was struggling so much with the cold – I was born and raised in a tropical country, we’d be wearing woolly-jumpers when it was 15C out. But the beautiful scenery at the range distracted me from complaining too much. Nature offered such a beautiful scene for me to enjoy, was I going to be rude and ungrateful? Having a thermos full of delicious hot tea also helped, of course.

The examples I gave above were of easy, non-challenging scenarios. It’s true, but the point is not to find ways to be grateful in difficult situations – though that’s an important life skill as well, the next level. The point of this reframe is to establish and/or to strengthen the habit of showing up when it comes to gratitude. I love James Clear’s recommendation of starting easy, so easy it may look or feel deceivingly insignificant. He shared the story of someone who lost a lot of weight and kept it off for years, and this person started their journey with going to the gym but staying for no longer than 5 minutes each time. Or someone who wanted to be a runner but started the habit with just putting on the running shoes daily. Isn’t it fascinating that we can trick ourselves like this?

More offering greatly appreciated.

Gratitude on its own is a wonderful thing, it increases our level of happiness. But the other thing I love about this reframe is the spirituality flavour to it. It’s an acknowledgement of a power greater than ourselves. My taking a moment to be grateful about the beautiful clouds, or the little mushroom that I notice during my walk, is the act of gratitude for something that is completely out of my control. It’s nature’s doing. It feels like magic that the more beauty I appreciate, the more I find them – the more I was given, the more was offered to me.

It may come across as being narcissistic, that one may think one is that special that nature makes efforts to make one happy. This is a side of this reframe and practice that I don’t personally notice in myself – maybe I have blinkers on? I borrow the lens of Christianity to look at this: that you are loved. In a world where many struggle to find meaning, this seemingly small practice may be a small step in the right direction.

My gratitude practice through this reframe makes me feel blessed. Loved.

It was a grey day, but this ivy with its beautiful buds lifted my mood.

*For those not familiar with morning pages, it’s a method introduced by Julia Cameron through her book The Artist’s Way. Every morning you “empty” your mind onto paper, you get rid of all the clutter there. You don’t even have to make your sentences make sense, the only goal to this exercise is to clear the block, because the (good?) ideas in your mind are queueing behind this clutter. It’s a powerful exercise; many people swear by it. I love and still do it, if just to declutter the mind, but every now and then you come up with an insight, you get to know the landscape of your mind better and how you view yourself and the world changes. I’d recommend it, of course, being a journaling-addict myself.